Yes, it has been awhile since I have unloaded my addled brain in a random rant about everything and nothing at all. Today I picked up the magical machine that will turn my sleepless nights into restful slumber that will miraculously give me more energy, clear my mind and help life to become much, much better. It seems that I have a case of Sleep Hypopnea with a minor dose of Sleep Apnea. This is probably why I am up several times per night. I was blaming it on my bladder and the overgrown puppy that I still haven't kicked out of the bed. He stretches his seventy plus pound, eight month old body between my husband and I effectively stealing the majority of the covers in the process. Sometimes his bladder wakes him up as well which means I get elected to take him downstairs to the backyard to do his business. The chiropractor advised me on Saturday that I should move him from the bed to the floor. I'm just not sure how to break that to him. He is so sweet and really, if he would just learn to sleep at the foot of the bed we could all sleep happily ever after. As is my usual way, I am digressing. Back to the Hypopnea. It seems this is becoming a more and more common condition world wide. It causes daytime sleepiness and obesity. Can I dare dream that I will lose my lifelong love of naps. Okay--maybe not lifelong. I'm sure I fought them when I was little. I started enjoying them in my teens. Could it mean that breathing at night would help me to become a little less chunky? What about my highly entertaining yet somewhat bizarre dreams? Are they a product of oxygen deprivation? Will I lose my ability to wake up each morning and say WTF? My dreams have become increasingly weirder in the past few months. I have blamed stress and an overly active imagination. The ghosts, body contortionist demons and abundance of fire on Saturday night did leave me mildly disturbed. Will my dreams become mundane when I am getting enough air at night? Time will tell.
If I would have read the article about the woman in Scotland with the Haunted Dolls before Saturday I would blame the article for my nightmares. I realize that my friends and family think that I have strange beliefs and ideas at times. I don't contradict them, strange is in the eye of the beholder. Yes, I can be weird. I will NEVER however spend thousands of dollars on Haunted Dolls. This woman trolls the Internet looking for dolls with spirits in them. It is believed that dolls came about as vessels to hold spirits. This woman communicates with the spirits in her dolls as do her children. They entertain the spirits and even have a babysitter for them if they are going to be away. I'm sorry--I would never babysit someones freaky dolls to make sure they didn't wreak havoc on their apartment while they were away. If the dolls are going to wreak havoc, I don'[t want to be anywhere near them when they do it. Dolls and clowns are two of the freakiest things I can think of. I know that I go ghost hunting but I would never invite a ghost to come live with my and become part of my family. I guess I should never say never. If I were to meet the right ghost, maybe we would settle down together~it is hard to say. Why would any ghost want to limit themselves to the body of a doll when they could be flying around free from constraints. Think of the places you could go. I wouldn't want to be in a stuffy apartment with a strange woman deciding what we should watch on the telly.
To those of you who text me. I am sorry if the letter "K" offends you. I usually try to text out complete words. I don't use things like LOL or other short cuts. I feel I am too old to use "u" instead of you. I will however type "K" instead of okay if I am busy or just being lazy. Last week one of Kyle's friends asked me if I was mad at him. He texted to say that he dropped in for a few minutes while we were gone. He let the dogs out and got a drink. He is like family so this was fine. I was in the car, as a passenger, and texted "K" because I get carsick texting in the car and wanted him to know that it was fine that he was there. The dogs were probably thrilled to see him. He is under the impression that "K", especially a big "K" means that you are mad or irritated at someone. I seldom get mad. When I am irritated, the majority of the time it is a personal issue. You may be irritating me but it is because I have a headache, I am tired or for whatever reason that probably has little to do with you and a lot to do with my mood. If I have texted "K" to any of you and you have thought I was mad--sorry. I will try to type okay from now on. If I do get lazy and type "k", I will use a small "k" so I'm not shouting.
I continue to be amazed at the world and the changes that have come about not only in my life time, but in the past few years. Technology is going way too fast for my aging brain. I never imagined signing documents online, sending my kids photos of something in the store to see if they would want it or asking my phone what "Hypopnea" means. My car talks to me, a microchip informed a doctor that I snored over 600 times one night, stopped breathing 4 times, had shallow breathing at least 23 times per hour and took in from 75%-93% oxygen through the night. Last week in the store the original Don McLean version of "American Pie" was playing. I told the clerk that I had the "45" when I was young and that you had to turn it over in the middle of the song since the song was so long. He smiled at me. When we left the store my friend reminded me that he probably had no idea what a "45" was. I have become my grandma. I speak of ancient things that my children and grandchildren will have no concept of. I used to sit up late listening to 62 KGW on the AM station waiting to hear my newest favorite song. If I was lucky I could hit record in time to not only catch the beginning of the song, but to miss the DJ talking over it. After capturing the music on my little device I would rewind and fast forward with a pen in hand trying to make out all of the lyrics. My kids have taught me that when I hear a new song I just have to hit an app on my phone that will be able to tell me who it is and what it is. Of course I can always Google the lyrics. Yes--I have digressed and gone all random on you. It is what I do. I also used to walk to school two miles in the snow up hill both ways!!
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