Hello, name is Lana Luke and I am addicted to hoarding Non-Fiction Self-Help books. I think I am going through some kind of mid-life crisis. I have some great books that I am sure would be very helpful in enlightening me on how to meet my many goals. The issue it that I need to actually open them! Reading the titles gives me some ideas, but reading them might actually teach me something.
Heck, if I would just take a stack and lift them twenty times per day with each arm I would probably get a decent work out. I love reading; I just happen to love reading really good fictional books with colorful characters who sweep me away to a different world where I can traipse around for awhile and forget what is piling up in my own world. If I open one of the non-fiction books it is going to want me to actually do something that will make a change. I am great at making big changes for a day or two but then fall back into my old, comfortable habits because I am too busy to actually have to think about implementing those changes daily. Being "too busy" is my way of coping. I fill my time with other commitments so I don't have to deal with my own issues.
I guess a key word in that last paragraph was "Big". I try to make "Big" changes. We are creatures of habit so it is hard to change those habits even when we know deep down inside that change is the only thing that is going to save us. I know all about making small goals and then adding in small changes here and there. I actually have made some small changes this year and am building on them. I just haven't yet opened any of the books on my self-help shelf. I also have made my list of goals so big that just looking at it overwhelms me. I tell myself I just have to make a few small changes, but that damn list is huge and how do I choose which ones? First goal~get out of my own head and quit overthinking everything!
One of the books that I'm sure is completely awesome is about using blogging as therapy. I believe I have blogged about this before. Blogging is my way of unloading the stuff in my brain that just won't seem to go away. That stuff in the way back that is stubborn and tickles my subconscious self. It makes me always feel like I'm forgetting something important or that I am missing a big puzzle piece that would miraculously give me insight into my divine purpose. Wouldn't it be nice if our divine purpose in life was stamped on the inside of our thigh or placed somewhere obvious so we wouldn't miss it? Why didn't I come with clear, easy to read instructions? My wiring is off a bit so having instructions that only pertained to me would be very helpful.
One of the goals that I have had and haven't followed through on is trying to blog at least once a week. This is doable if I actually put it on the calendar and make myself do it. Once upon a time, not so long ago I took a stress management class. I liked it so much I took the follow up as well. I lived my life by the principles for a few years and saw a difference in my attitude, my weight and my energy level. I let a couple of set backs derail me and here I am again--floundering a bit. My attitude is decent but the weight and energy level need a lot of work. I became complacent and lost site of my goals. I actually started to question what those goals were and decided that I didn't even know myself anymore. We all grow and change, it is great when we are actually award of it happening.
I started my blog page a few years back. It is floating out there in cyberspace. A few people read it now and again. I haven't made any real attempts to grow it. I re-post everything on my Facebook Page so a few people actually read it. I titled it "Rediscovering, Reinventing and Rewriting" because I realized that sometimes in life you need to step back and really look at who you are as opposed to who you want to be. It is all a matter of perspective. I feel that many people have me packed away in a little box with a simple label. I label myself sometimes. We should never be labeled. There is more to everyone than the opinion you form on your first glance. The goal of the blog was to help myself "Rediscover" who I am under all of those labels; "Reinvent" myself so that I can be who I choose to be and then "Rewrite" my story. By rewriting I don't mean that the facts themselves need to be changed. Rewrite it showing a different perspective. I spent a lot of years not liking parts of that kid I used to be or the girl who made some really stupid decisions. I blamed her for a lot of things. When I step back and look at my past from an adult point of view and take the facts into consideration I see things in a whole new light. Remember that bad stuff that happened in the past--leave it there. If you have to take it out and examine it, look at it from a different angle and rewrite it that way. That may be a topic for a whole different blog.....
If I'm going to make changes before I'm too old and feeble to care, I need to start again now. Taking words like "try", "attempt" and "maybe" out of the equation and using a resounding "I am going to" will make all of the difference in the world. We all flounder now an then. We all fall and have to get back up. I need to make sure my recovery time is a little quicker this time around. It is great to make a list of goals if you are actually planning to achieve them. Many things look good on paper~they look even better when you can check them off as accomplished. My office is filled with lists--time to clean it out and start fresh.
I recently purchased a new kind of book~a planner. I have a planner every year. I use them religiously and have had the same brand for years. My trusty, favorite planner is being discontinued. I had to log onto Amazon and find something else that would fit my needs. You can imagine my surprise and delight when I found "The Inner Guide Planner" for 2015-16. Forgive me as I turn into an infomercial for a product that I think is awesome! It is a 12 month guide that gives you places to set weekly and monthly goals. There is space to envision what you want to accomplish and how you want your life to look. There are guides to living a more fulfilling life, questions for self-discovery and other tools that can keep you on track if you open the damn book and use them. I solemnly swear to use my new planner as a valued tool in making this next year full of positive changes.
I will use my blog to help perpetuate the journey and to keep me on track. I could use some fellow travelers to chime in now and again. I encourage anyone who wants to take a spiritual path to finding peace, happiness, inner strength or whatever you are looking for to join in. I have a Facebook group page that I titled "Journey to Health, Happiness and Balance". It has been around for awhile and I post things somewhat regularly. I will start using it more now. I may even crack open a few of those self-help books and see if any of them are worth mentioning in future posts!
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